Chapter 0068: Feigning Madness to Manipulate Xie Chengze, The Royal Family’s Bizarre Blend of Affection and Toxicity
Seeing Emperor Jian refuse to relent, Xie Chengze couldn’t be bothered to continue their father-son charade. He flopped back onto the bed with a theatrical sigh.
“Truly, a man’s words are as reliable as a ghost’s whispers. This son has finally learned his lesson.”
Emperor Jian: “…”
The Emperor couldn’t comprehend why court sessions were so objectionable. Wasn’t it just rising at mao hour daily to attend morning court, listening to factions impeach each other while eliminating rivals, awaiting ministers’ reports on regional disasters, and finally watching officials bicker over responsibilities…
Alright.
Emperor Jian silently wiped his brow. Even he needed to watch young Chengze’s antics daily to endure court sessions with some semblance of cheerfulness, let alone Xie Chengze who currently found zero appeal in court affairs.
For a fleeting moment, Emperor Jian almost missed the version of Xie Chengze who used to dutifully clock in for daily court sessions.
“How about this: We permit you fifteen days of monthly court leave,” Emperor Jian negotiated. “Just attend every other day.”
“Five days on, five days off at month’s start; five on, five off mid-month; five on, five off at month’s end.” Xie Chengze wiggled five pale slender fingers. “This son has no desire to bald prematurely like those ministers. What if I can’t find a princess consort and end up lonely in old age?”
“Acceptable.” Emperor Jian nodded. Mention of a princess consort suddenly made him realize Xie Chengze had indeed reached marriageable age. He teased, “Since when do you care so about appearances? Have you taken fancy to some minister’s daughter?”
“Not at all.” Xie Chengze maintained perfect seriousness. “I’ve taken fancy to a minister’s son.”
Cough—! Emperor Jian choked on his saliva, pounding his chest while coughing violently. Eunuch Zhao rushed forward exclaiming “Aiyo!” as he patted the Emperor’s back. Shooting Xie Chengze a look blending reproach and helplessness, he chided, “Second Prince! Stop this nonsense! See how you’ve startled His Majesty!”
“What’s wrong?” Xie Chengze kept his expression earnest. “I don’t need heirs for the throne. What harm in spending my life with a man? Not just one—I’ll find ten!”
His declaration rang with militant enthusiasm, “And each must have distinct features!”
Eunuch Zhao nearly fainted: “Aiyo—my young ancestor!”
Emperor Jian’s coughs intensified, “Cough! You—cough cough—!”
After long moments, the Emperor finally suppressed his shock and resignation, sighing, “You… ah… how shall We face your mother in the netherworld!”
Xie Chengze inwardly retorted: Save your concern. You might reach the netherworld before I ever find my true love.
But aloud he sweetly responded, “Mother Consort always doted on me. She’d surely understand, just as Imperial Father will support me—after all, your son’s happiness matters most.”
Emperor Jian: “…”
Noting the Emperor’s lingering resistance, Xie Chengze resumed sighing mournfully. “Seems my explosives research was wasted. No wonder Imperial Father never replied to my request for rare delicacies and beauties—planning to enjoy all benefits without reciprocation…”
“No court leave, no handsome men… Life holds no meaning. Better to drown in sorrow and waste away, joining Mother Consort in the netherworld sooner…”
Emperor Jian: “…”
Emperor Jian was both exasperated and amused, thinking to himself that this child had mastered the art of speaking convincingly whether his words were reasonable or not. After the trip to Yi Province, his little temper had become even more cunning and unpredictable.
But which minister’s son had caught little Chengze’s eye? He’d never heard of the boy showing interest in anyone before…
Emperor Jian suddenly paused.
Wait?!
Could it be… Shen Yuan?
The Emperor felt both surprised and yet not entirely shocked. After all, Shen Yuan was indeed exceptionally handsome, accomplished in both literary and military arts, and possessed an upright and loyal character. Having spent months together in Yi Province supporting each other, it would be natural for sparks to fly instantly or for affection to grow over time.
However…
The Emperor gently rubbed the jade ring on his finger, deep in thought. Shen Yuan was someone who could be of great use – an excellent chess piece for purging the court. Originally, he had intended to reserve this person for the Crown Prince, to serve as a major support in maintaining governance after the Crown Prince ascended the throne.
Giving him to Chengze… he couldn’t bear to do that.
Noticing Xie Chengze’s eager expression that seemed to say “Father, hurry up and ask me which minister’s son it is,” Emperor Jian decisively decided not to inquire further, lest the next words out of his mouth be a request for an arranged marriage.
“Chengze, you’ve just woken up and must still be very tired. You should rest more. I won’t disturb you any longer.” Emperor Jian said with a pained expression on his face. Having said this, he practically flew out of Cheng Huan Palace as if his backside were on fire, dragging Eunuch Zhao along with him.
The expectation on Xie Chengze’s face rapidly faded away. After a moment, he curled his lips disdainfully. “You little rascal, do you really think you can outmaneuver me?”
Emperor Jian must have thought he liked Shen Yuan but couldn’t bear to waste such a valuable chess piece on a son without blood relations, hence he quickly shut him down and didn’t dare ask further.
Ah~ Xie Chengze helplessly spread his small hands.
Manipulating Emperor Jian was simply too easy~
But Xie Chengze soon found himself unable to laugh anymore.
Because Emperor Jian’s oceanic paternal love, though delayed, came crashing down with overwhelming force.
“Second Prince, though His Majesty doesn’t say it aloud, in his heart he cares for you the most! He would gladly offer you all the finest things in the world!” Eunuch Zhao clapped his hands, and the little eunuchs behind him stepped forward one by one, unrolling the scrolls they held.
Each scroll vividly depicted a young gentleman in colorful ink, each possessing elegant demeanor and superior appearance. Beside each portrait was even stamped with the subject’s refined seal script, noting their family background, height, preferences, and special skills – truly comprehensive and considerate in every detail.
“These are all the respectable young gentlemen in Jingcheng with good appearances. If Second Prince doesn’t fancy any of them, His Majesty will send people to search in other provinces.”
Eunuch Zhao’s psychological resilience was truly remarkable, having now completely accepted the Second Prince’s preferences and enthusiastically introducing them. “This is Han Yuyun, grandson of the Vice Minister of Rites. Though he’s a concubine-born son from the second branch, he’s highly talented and quite renowned in Jingcheng. He stands seven chi two cun tall, has a slender build, excels at chess, maintains a clean private life, and has a root length exceeding four cun…”
Xie Chengze: ?
Xie Chengze had been listening with great interest when he suddenly encountered unfamiliar knowledge. He couldn’t help but ask curiously, “Eunuch Zhao, what is root length?”
Eunuch Zhao paused, inexplicably becoming shy. “Oh dear, Your Highness, it’s that thing… the one that we servants don’t have!”
Xie Chengze: ?
Xie Chengze: ???
Wait? You even investigated this? What kind of perverts are you royalty?
Eunuch Zhao silently pondered. After His Majesty returned that day, he immediately dispatched agents to secretly investigate whether the Second Prince and Lord Shen had any special relationship during their time in Yi Province. Later, from the accompanying military physician, he learned that the Second Prince actually…
Oh dear, this must not be spoken or even thought of.
Eunuch Zhao patted his own mouth and continued, “Your Highness, if you’ve taken a liking to any young master, you may directly summon them to the palace. Take your time getting to know them properly. Even if you’re still choosing by the age of thirty, there’s no hurry at all.”
Xie Chengze:…
I’m truly grateful to you all—such thoughtful yet perverse imperial family members, ah!