Chapter 43: Kidney Deficiency and the Resentful Consort

The young man’s gaze was too scorching, drawing attention for no reason.

All the guests present knew the two were betrothed, tacitly clearing that space for them.

Lin Zhaoheng shot a meaningful glance, and two housekeepers stepped forward to escort the ill-timed Lin Zhirou away.

Seeing this, Lin Pinyan immediately took sides: “Yes! Brother-in-law!”

His voice was extremely obsequious.

Smack! Lin Xihe landed a slap on the boy’s shoulder, scolding in a low voice: “Children shouldn’t speak nonsense.”

She didn’t even know how to tell him to shut up. Wen Zhixu glanced at this utterly non-combative young lady and stepped forward, whispering: “Are you angry? I’ve been these past few days—”

Before he could finish, someone carrying a large object squeezed in forcefully: “Lady Lin, your birthday gift!”

Lin Xihe was speechless. With her combat power reduced to zero, she had actually received a sharpened treasured sword.

She took the sword, her arm sinking downward, and had no choice but to steel herself and say: “Thank you, Young Master Xie.”

Xie Qi: “…” No need to thank me, really.

He was never one to hold back, his mouth moving faster than his brain: “If you discover anyone visiting brothels, Lady Lin, use this sword to chop off whichever arm they use for embracing and fondling.”

Xie Qi added: “They should be dealt with according to family discipline.”

The implication couldn’t be more obvious.

Wen Zhixu’s face immediately darkened. If there weren’t so many people present, he would have already beaten up Xie Qi.

Lin Xihe seemed thoughtful, gripping the sword with both hands and executing an empty sword flourish in Wen Zhixu’s direction.

“So heavy,” she said with complete seriousness, “Domestic violence—I’m not cut out for that.”

“…”

The group strolled casually to the central courtyard, which connected the inner and outer areas with constant traffic. They could see Lin Zhaoheng chatting happily with friends, while young masters and misses gathered casually, sharing private conversations.

Wen Zhixu wanted to be alone with Lin Xihe, but saw her being led away by Xie Qi’s sister, Xie Lan.

Xie Qi: “Lan’er just wants to share some private words with Lady Lin. Why are you like this?”

Wen Zhixu said indignantly: “She’s kidnapped her.”

Xie Qi’s expression cracked for a moment: “Do you know what you look like right now?”

Wen Zhixu shot him a cold glance.

Xie Qi: “Like a resentful consort banished to the cold palace by the Emperor!”

Soon, dull sounds of fists and kicks connecting emerged from the rockery at one side of the central courtyard.

A certain unlucky fellow’s wails were drowned out by the two young women’s casual chatter.

Xie Lan had heard about Lady Lin from her brother eight hundred times and had long wanted to meet her in person.

Today, she finally saw her.

“What would you like to eat?” Lin Xihe had just turned to entertain her when Xie Lan fell to her knees with a thud.

“Xie Lan bows in gratitude for Miss Lin’s life-saving grace!”

Lin Xihe: …What’s going on?

Madam Xie and the Empress were cousins, often visiting the palace to share private conversations. Through these visits, the Empress had taken note of Xie Lan’s marriage prospects.

Among all the court officials, only Wen Country Duke Manor had both suitable social status and unmarried sons of appropriate age.

Learning that Wen Zhixu disliked Lin Xihe, the Empress intended to match him with Xie Lan instead, while having Xie Qi marry Lin Xihe.

Recently, she had specially sent a trusted housekeeper to “enlighten” Wen Zhixu.

When Xie Lan heard Wen Zhixu’s name, she absolutely refused, causing an uproar in their residence.

Only one person was happy about this arrangement: Xie Qi was overjoyed at the prospect of becoming even closer with his good friend.

Xie Lan poured out her grievances to Lin Xihe: “Who wants to marry that ice block! There’s not a kind word from his mouth. Last time when my brother went out with him and wanted to buy me some preserved fruits, guess what he said?”

Lin Xihe recalled the preserved peaches Wen Zhixu had sent and blurted out, “He said, ‘It’s just some dried fruit, bought on a whim’?”

Xie Lan fumed, “He said only pigs eat that much! He wouldn’t even let the carriage stop longer outside the pastry shop!”

Lin Xihe: “…” That tongue of his was indeed sharp.

Xie Lan kept addressing her as “benefactor,” giving Lin Xihe the illusory sense of “saving the world and aiding the people.”

“When exactly are you and Wen Zhixu getting married?”

Xie Lan was genuinely uneasy. Until these two tied the knot, she remained in peril, terrified that an imperial decree might suddenly arrive at her home. She’d rather die than marry someone named Wen.

Lin Xihe: “We’re just friends! Besides, he doesn’t want to marry me either.”

“Fr—friends?” The pastry in Xie Lan’s hand fell to the ground.

Just then, an unfamiliar matron stood waiting respectfully in the outer courtyard of Tinghe Courtyard: “Miss Lin, the Second Young Master sent this old servant to deliver dried apricots to you.”

At the mention of “dried apricots,” Lin Xihe’s eyes instantly lit up.

“Is this how friends act?” Xie Lan pointed at the familiar “Chantangzhai” paper package, utterly astonished. “The preserved fruits from that shop—you can’t get them without queuing for at least half an hour!”

The largest courtyard of the Lin residence had been arranged like a garden party. Lin Zhaoheng had gone to great lengths to delight his daughter.

Stone tables were laden with drinks, cakes, and fruits, all the latest trends in the capital. An unfamiliar chef was crafting dough figures, his technique captivating Lin Xihe enough to pause and watch.

“Shall I make a little pig for Miss Lin?” the chef asked with a smile.

Lin Xihe’s eyes curved happily.

The chef’s fingers flew, and in moments, he had shaped a crimson pig’s head with an unusually long snout.

The design looked all too familiar. Lin Xihe fell silent: How would an ancient chef know about Piggy Paige?

Footsteps approached, accompanied by the hushed chatter of young masters and ladies. As Lin Xihe turned, a gentle shadow fell over her from the side.

Wen Zhixu had appeared beside her without notice and softly asked, “Do you like it?” He had specifically had the Wen family chef learn this.

His tone was unusually tender, starkly different from his usual self. Lin Xihe studied him for a moment before realizing, “Are you sick?”

Wen Zhixu was momentarily stunned. He had been burying himself in the jade shop daily, learning to make jade hairpins from the old craftsman Li Qixing. If he were sick, it was from exhaustion.

A faint smile touched his lips as he gladly accepted Lin Xihe’s concern: “You care about me.”

Lin Xihe nodded matter-of-factly: “Well, you’re my friend.”

Friends again. The slight smile on Wen Zhixu’s lips faded.

“Hey—” Xie Qi’s ill-timed shout came from not far away. Both turned to see him waving a throwing arrow high in the air, beckoning them to join the game.

Gaudy nonsense. Wen Zhixu shot a silent glare in his direction.

Lin Xihe remembered what Xie Qi’s attendant had said—that Wen Zhixu had recently vanished from Panxiang Street, likely lingering in pleasure quarters.

She coughed awkwardly, sidled closer to Wen Zhixu, and whispered conspiratorially near his ear, “Listen to a friend’s advice… you need to practice moderation. Otherwise, it’s easy to develop kidney deficiency. Health is the foundation of revolution, you know.”

Moderation. Kidney deficiency. The words hammered in Wen Zhixu’s head, leaving him dazed.

“Let’s go play arrow throwing!” Lin Xihe made to run but halted abruptly, her peripheral vision catching Wen Zhixu’s hand. He was gripping the squirrel-fur pomander at her waist, neither too lightly nor too firmly.

She adored this furry pom-pom dearly and, fearing to lose it, had tightly wound the tasseled cord around her wrist.

Lin Xihe was tugged back by the force, stumbling a step backward just as his voice, lowered to a whisper, slipped into her ear: “What does ‘kidney deficiency’ mean?”

How could she explain? Was she supposed to give Professor Lin an impromptu lecture on male health right there?!

Wen Zhixu pondered briefly, his voice growing even deeper and slower: “Are you implying that I… have weak kidney essence?”

Lin Xihe: “…”

Xie Qi: “Wen Er, warrior maiden, your turn to throw!”

Lin Xihe grew anxious: “Why are you pulling me? Go ask your bros, don’t ask me!”

Moments later, she held a bundle of arrows. The first missed, the second went astray…

Wen Zhixu had already pulled Xie Qi aside to get the full story, his expression darkening repeatedly: “So this is the nonsense you told her?”

Xie Qi grumbled sheepishly: “The servants in the mansion said it! Who told you to disappear in the red-light district?”

Wen Zhixu gritted his teeth: “The jade shop is right behind Panxiang Street! I was just taking a shortcut!”

As Xie Qi tried to defend himself, his friend’s merciless fists rained down upon him.

While Lin Xihe failed to land her arrows, Wen Zhixu’s punches landed squarely on Xie Qi’s most tender spots.

…Lin Xihe proudly claimed the only zero score of the entire game.

The biggest winner was Xie Qi’s sister Xie Lan, who had practiced horseback riding and archery since childhood and easily took first place.

The grand prize was simple and straightforward—a chubby, hefty silver ingot. Lin Xihe watched enviously as Xie Lan walked away with the ingot, her heart bleeding with regret.

“Want it?” Wen Zhixu, refreshed after beating up Xie Qi, picked up ten arrows and announced to the crowd, “I haven’t had my turn yet.”

Lin Xihe immediately latched onto her “Golden Thigh,” fawningly moving closer to become his exclusive cheer squad.

Wen Zhixu did not disappoint—ten shots, ten perfect hits, can be called a human arrow-pitching machine.

He said to Xie Lan, “My apologies,” and snatched the still-warm ingot right from her hands.

The silver ingot landed in Lin Xihe’s palm.

Having her hard-won prize snatched away, Xie Lan stamped her foot in fury: “Wen Zhixu, you scoundrel! I won that!”

Wen Zhixu calmly cupped his hands: “Thank you for your generosity, Miss Xie.”

After the lively banter, Lin Xihe had broken into a light sweat and accepted the small fan Qingwu handed her. Suddenly hearing cicadas chirping, she wandered along the corridor toward the densely shaded trees.

When Wen Zhixu found her, the young woman was gently poking a cicada exuviae on a tree trunk with her fan handle.

He stopped not far away, watching her antics with amusement.

“You’ve always been afraid of insects. Not scared today?”

Startled by his voice, Lin Xihe felt an inexplicable competitive urge: “Says who? This is called ‘the cicada sheds its shell’—it’s empty! Where’s the insect?”

Wen Zhixu’s gaze traveled past her, focusing intently behind: “You’d better not move.”

The young woman’s expression froze, stiffening like the stone lions outside the Lin residence.

He stepped forward, reaching toward the tree.

After a delayed moment, Lin Xihe realized: This guy is teasing me again! I won’t fall for it!

Dropping her guard, she swatted his hand away and stretched out her arm, intending to hook down the cicada exuviae with her fan handle.

Unexpectedly, what tangled around the fan handle first wasn’t the exuviae—but a silvery thread.

The thread glistened in the sunlight like a miniature parachute cord, dangling something slowly descending from the tree—

A live, plump, eight-legged creature frantically kicking—

A spider.

In that moment, Wen Zhixu witnessed a marvel: a person’s face truly could shift colors like a painter’s palette.

Startled out of her wits, Lin Xihe let out a silent scream, grabbing the nearest human shield. Her head knocked against his chin as she burrowed tightly into his embrace.

His tall frame enveloped her, shielding her completely.

“Spiders… I’m terrified of spiders…”

Wen Zhixu winced from the impact to his chin, glancing down to see a small hair whorl at the crown of her head, resembling swirling storm clouds gathering before a thunderstorm.

He held her with one arm while using his other hand to brush away the ill-fated spider.

“It’s gone.”

Lin Xihe didn’t believe him, her face still buried in his chest, her voice vibrating through his ribcage: “…No, check again.”

Wen Zhixu scanned their surroundings – there was no trace of the spider left.

To reassure her, he took a few deliberate steps on the ground and coaxed helplessly: “I’ve squashed it. It’s really gone.”

Lin Xihe’s shoulders relaxed slightly as she peeked suspiciously from his embrace, stealing a glance at the ground.

Her casual glance happened to catch their waists, where the squirrel-fur pomander ornaments had become hopelessly entangled, their tassels twisted into an inseparable knot.

She reached out, carefully attempting to separate them.

But from above came Wen Zhixu’s soft sigh: “I’ve never visited brothels, not even once. These past few days I’ve been at the jade shop, leaving early and returning late. The reason I didn’t write to you is that the carrier pigeon doesn’t know the way to your mother’s residence.”

Lin Xihe withdrew from his embrace, lowering her eyes dejectedly, her fingers unconsciously poking at the squirrel tail ornament on his waist: “Who asked for your explanations…”