Chapter 14 “What exactly do you like about me?…”

Several servants gathered outside Songlan Courtyard, seemingly discussing something.

Hearing footsteps, they turned around and immediately showed excitement upon seeing Si Jin.

“Madam, you’ve come.”

“Is he still not letting anyone enter the room?”

“Yes, the master has his door tightly shut. We have no idea what’s happening inside.”

Si Jin nodded slightly and walked straight into the courtyard.

The courtyard was quiet, and no movement could be heard from inside the room through the door.

Si Jin raised her hand to knock: “It’s me. May I come in?”

After the knocking ceased, there was no response from inside.

Si Jin frowned slightly and knocked a few more times.

A thud came from inside the room, followed by clearly flustered crashing sounds.

“What are you doing in there? Why aren’t you answering?”

Xiao Rong’s voice finally came from inside: “Wait.”

Another clatter followed, sounding even more urgent than Xiao Rong’s voice.

Si Jin’s frown deepened. Remembering Xiao Rong’s severely injured state, she feared he might have encountered some trouble alone in the room.

Worried, she instinctively pushed against the door.

Unexpectedly, resistance met her push, causing the door to rattle.

He actually locked the door!

What exactly was he doing inside?

Si Jin’s face darkened: “Xiao Rong, what are you doing in there!”

As soon as she finished speaking, unlocking sounds came from behind the door, and soon it was pulled open from inside.

Xiao Rong stood there neatly dressed and seemingly normal. Apart from his lips remaining pale, which against his cold fair skin made his overall haggard appearance obvious at a glance, he didn’t seem to have any other major issues.

He lifted his gaze to meet Si Jin’s slightly angry eyes, unusually avoiding prolonged eye contact by lowering his eyes first: “Nothing much.”

The servants peeking from not far away simultaneously showed knowing smiles.

“Only Madam can handle this.”

“Of course, Madam was quite imposing just now.”

“The master’s plan is brilliant – deliberately keeping us out, so only Madam can enter to care for him.”

“Ah? Was the master doing this on purpose today?”

“I don’t know, I’m just guessing. Isn’t that the case?”

…

A strong herbal scent came rushing from inside the room.

Si Jin’s gaze swept past Xiao Rong’s shoulder and arm, noticing the somewhat messy medicinal herbs and bandages on the table.

She quickly withdrew her gaze and looked Xiao Rong up and down again.

He really did appear completely fine.

“Your injuries…”

Si Jin quickly stopped herself from asking “are they already better?”

How could they possibly be better.

She changed her question: “Have you already applied medicine?”

“Not finished yet. When you knocked just now, I got dressed to open the door for you first.”

So that’s how those noises happened.

But Si Jin recalled the urgency in those sounds and couldn’t help feeling somewhat uncomfortable.

She said: “Then I’ll call someone to apply medicine for you.”

“No.” Xiao Rong quickly reached out to grasp Si Jin’s wrist, releasing it just before she could pull away. “It’s precisely because I don’t want others to see that I haven’t allowed anyone to serve me today.”

Si Jin paused, her gaze unconsciously drifting toward Xiao Rong’s injured right arm, though his clothing blocked any view of the actual injury.

Was it because the wounds were too gruesome that he didn’t want anyone to see?

Xiao Rong added, “I can manage on my own. I was almost done applying the medicine earlier.”

Si Jin suddenly realized her rushed arrival made it seem as though she cared deeply about him. Now that she confirmed Xiao Rong wasn’t seriously injured—just stubbornly enduring discomfort for the sake of pride—what more was there to say?

“…Alright then.”

With that, she turned to leave.

“Actually, it’s not that manageable.”

Si Jin paused and looked back at him in confusion. “What?”

“The wound looks rather unpleasant. I don’t want others to see it, but if I truly can’t manage, could you call a servant in for me?”

As Si Jin followed Xiao Rong’s broad-backed figure into his room, she remained bewildered, unable to make sense of the situation.

Xiao Rong didn’t want anyone to see his wound.

Wasn’t she a person too?

It wasn’t until Xiao Rong had her sit at the table while he took the medical kit behind the screen that things became clearer.

The screen cast the shadow of him undressing. Though merely a silhouette without substance, it sharply outlined his broad shoulders and narrow waist.

Si Jin’s gaze faltered for a moment before she quickly averted her eyes.

The faint rustling of clothes being removed at close range unsettled her. She soon spoke to drown out the sounds: “Since Doctor Liu is on leave from the estate, why didn’t you have the servants summon another physician?”

“Aside from those in the estate, no outsiders know about my injury yet. Spreading word of it would invite unnecessary troubles.”

Xiao Rong’s status was unusual, and indeed, many paid close attention to his every move.

Put that way, it seemed reasonable.

Si Jin parted her lips, about to ask another question.

“Hiss—”

A suppressed hiss of pain came from behind the screen.

Instinctively, Si Jin turned toward the sound.

Her gaze fixed on the tall, dark shadow cast on the screen—now turned sideways, his profile making the lines of his physique even more distinct.

What she had seen before, and what she hadn’t, now all entered her vision.

Si Jin’s throat tightened, and she swiftly looked away again.

“Do you need me to call a servant in?”

“No need. It’s almost done.”

Hearing Xiao Rong’s calm tone, Si Jin belatedly realized:

Why had she followed him into his room in the first place? Since he was putting on such a brave front, if he were truly incapable, he wouldn’t be unable to call for help himself.

Si Jin immediately stood up to leave.

Just then, Xiao Rong emerged from behind the screen. Seeing her standing rigidly, he asked, “What’s wrong?”

Si Jin felt somewhat awkward but replied promptly, “I’m returning to my room.”

“Why? You just arrived. Stay a while longer.” His voice softened as he added, “I slept last night.”

Si Jin gave him a strange look. “Since you’ve finished changing the bandages, there’s no need for me to stay. Besides, you deliberately said those things earlier, didn’t you? You never needed my help.”

Xiao Rong didn’t refute Si Jin’s accusation—or perhaps he never intended to explain himself.

“Can’t we sit and talk?”

Si Jin pressed her lips together and didn’t answer.

What did they have to say to each other?

Xiao Rong’s breath hitched. “You came to see me on your own, concerned about my injury. I thought… you had forgiven me because of this.”

Si Jin’s eyes widened. Had he misunderstood something?

She couldn’t harden her heart and turn a blind eye to Xiao Rong’s severe injuries, but that didn’t mean she could accept his year-long deception, let alone his subsequent threats and control over her.

But before she could refute Xiao Rong, Si Jin thought first: “Did you do such a dangerous thing just to make me forgive you?”

If that were truly the case, then he was seriously ill.

Xiao Rong denied it: “No, I didn’t think that much at the time.”

But he quickly added: “But if you could forgive me because of this, that would be even better.”

Si Jin glared at him with fluctuating emotions.

Xiao Rong clearly saw that she didn’t like hearing this.

He lowered his gaze and didn’t continue with the matter.

After a moment of silence in the room, Xiao Rong suddenly said out of the blue: “A few days ago, I inquired with the Bureau of Personnel Selection about your brother’s transfer.”

Si Jin’s heartbeat stopped for an instant, her voice tense: “What are you trying to do now?”

Xiao Rong raised his eyes and fixed them on Si Jin’s face, not speaking for a long while before saying: “I just wanted to ask about the progress of your brother’s transfer, but there’s no new information for now.”

Her restored heartbeat pounded loudly, making her chest feel numb.

She tried hard to suppress her expression, not daring to make any rash moves, unsure why Xiao Rong had suddenly brought this up again.

But it sounded like he didn’t know that Si Ming’s transfer had already been finalized.

Xiao Rong immediately followed up: “If I promise not to interfere with your brother’s transfer anymore, would you be able to forgive me?”

Si Jin emerged from her tense emotions and stared at him blankly.

So he had circled the conversation back to this.

But Si Jin didn’t trust him, nor did she plan to forgive him.

When she didn’t respond, Xiao Rong spoke again: “I’ve never admired anyone else, I’ve only ever loved you. I didn’t know what to do – when you exposed my lies, I panicked, afraid you would leave me, so I resorted to extreme measures.”

Si Jin was taken aback. Looking at Xiao Rong’s seemingly sincere appearance and hearing these words that were completely different from his usual repetitive phrases, she couldn’t help but think that perhaps she could believe him.

“So you’re willing to divorce me then.”

“Not willing.”

Si Jin: “…”

He couldn’t even pretend for a moment.

Just like before, even though his attitude was no longer as forceful this time, no matter how nicely he spoke, when it came to divorce, his true nature would still be revealed.

Si Jin defensively took half a step back, not noticing Xiao Rong’s gaze darkening as she retreated.

Xiao Rong didn’t step forward to press closer, remaining where he stood, his tone carrying a hint of humble pleading: “Can you give me another chance?”

“What chance?”

“The chance to keep you.” Xiao Rong paused, his voice deepening further, “For the past half month, you haven’t been willing to speak with me, and you haven’t shown me any kindness. It’s been very difficult for me. Though it seems hard to salvage now, I still want to try.”

Xiao Rong’s attitude had undergone a complete transformation.

It was as if to keep her, he was willing to lower his status and let go of his obsessions.

Was this still Xiao Rong?

Si Jin couldn’t help but ask: “What exactly do you like about me?”

His persistence truly puzzled her.

Xiao Rong answered extremely quickly: “Everything. I like all of you.”

“From before until now, I’ve always wanted to be with you. That has never changed.”

Si Jin: “…”

She probably shouldn’t have asked that question.

Xiao Rong paid no mind to her silence and continued, “Next month, I’ve been ordered to go south and will be away from the capital for half a month. Before that, let us get along well during this time. Do not treat me coldly anymore. Give me some more time. When I return from this trip, whatever answer you give me, I will accept it. Is that alright?”

Si Jin was startled, lifting her gaze in a daze. “Including divorce?”

Xiao Rong lowered his eyes, avoiding her gaze, allowing her only to see his slightly trembling lashes after his eyelids fell, as if unsettled.

Instead of answering, he asked in return, “Must you give me your answer now, before the time has even come?”

Si Jin’s gaze unconsciously fixed on Xiao Rong’s thick, long lashes. In this state, he looked somewhat pitiful, unlike someone telling lies.

If that were the case, if Xiao Rong’s words were true, she only needed to spend this period of time with him, and she could smoothly divorce him without having to flee the capital.

Xiao Rong raised his eyes, his lashes no longer obscuring his gaze, but those deep, dark pupils held the affection he was expressing, seemingly bottomless, making one feel as if they were about to be drawn in upon a single glance.

“Can I trust you?” Si Jin murmured.

Xiao Rong looked directly into Si Jin’s eyes, as if to demonstrate his sincerity.

But only he himself knew that his intention was simply to look at her.

His thin lips moved slightly as he slowly uttered, “Are you willing to trust me?”

Si Jin hesitated inwardly, unsure whether she should believe him.

On one hand, she thought, this was Xiao Rong—how many times had he deceived her since childhood, from childish pranks in their youth to now, in matters of her marriage? How could she trust him again?

Yet she couldn’t help but think, with her capabilities, what other method did she have to end this marriage? It was wrong for Xiao Rong to deceive her, but he had genuinely rushed into the fire, disregarding danger, to save her.

Perhaps the recent period of stalemate had made him realize that his persistence would yield no results. She did not hold such strong resentment; all she wanted was to smoothly end this marriage.

After a long silence, Si Jin finally replied in a low voice, “Then… let’s get along peacefully, as long as you don’t do anything strange.”

Xiao Rong’s eyes brightened, the corners of his lips lifting into a distinct curve as he smiled brightly, like a sudden flash of light before one’s eyes.

Si Jin stiffly averted her gaze from his smiling face and dryly left him with, “You’ve applied the medicine, and I’ve spoken with you. I’ll take my leave now.”

She should have added one more condition: he must not smile at her so casually like that either.

He must have done that on purpose just now.