Chapter 28

“But I only know how to cling to you.”…

Si Jin found it difficult not to dwell on the words Xiao Rong had spoken.

Though the night’s thoughts had been swept away by the intensity of their passion, the clarity of daylight inevitably brought them back to mind.

Si Jin kept recalling the way Xiao Rong had smiled at that moment.

How could anyone smile about such a thing?

Even if it was a smile, it didn’t seem to stem from joy.

Xiao Rong was far from idle, yet Si Jin knew he had already spent considerable time accompanying her.

After breakfast this morning, Xiao Rong had left the residence.

Rather than idling in her room, Si Jin soon dismissed the other servants in the courtyard, retaining only Lan Xin and Qiu Ya, whom she summoned into her chambers.

She intended to inquire about Xiao Rong’s parents.

Her intuition told her she should have known about this before, but now, having forgotten everything, she felt powerless—unable even to comfort him, unsure where to begin.

After she posed her question, Si Jin noticed the two maids visibly pause, exchanging a glance.

Frowning, she asked, “Why that expression?”

Were they about to say something that would vex her again?

But Lan Xin quickly collected herself and replied, “Forgive me, madam. I was merely surprised because, before leaving this morning, the master had already instructed us about this matter. And then you actually asked about it—we were astonished by the tacit understanding between you and the master.”

Si Jin’s expression softened, slightly taken aback. “He guessed I would ask about this? So I did know about it before, correct?”

Qiu Ya nodded. “You and the master have known each other since childhood, maintained close ties over the years, and are now married. Naturally, you’ve long been aware.”

Si Jin fell silent for a moment upon hearing this.

Though she didn’t know the details, she could already surmise that it must be a sorrowful and heavy matter.

This was also why she couldn’t bring herself to ask Xiao Rong directly.

Having him recount it himself would be akin to making him reopen old wounds.

Unbidden, Si Jin recalled the expression on Xiao Rong’s face when he had spoken those words last night.

A smile had touched his lips, yet his expression had been somber—unlike any she had seen from him before. Even the memory of it felt somewhat chilling.

Steeling herself, Si Jin looked directly at the two maids.

“Then tell me everything. Be thorough. I want to know it all.”

Xiao Manor.

The guards at the entrance were startled to see the familiar figure who had long been absent. They quickly bowed their heads in respectful greeting. “Young Master.”

Xiao Rong strode forward without breaking pace, offering no additional glance to anyone else, his gaze dark as he entered the manor with determined steps.

The narrow path was dim and secluded, the daylight largely blocked by the overly lush greenery on either side.

At the end of the path, a figure clad in black swiftly passed by.

Xiao Rong halted, his expression growing even darker, his eyes narrowing sharply as he watched the figure gradually recede into the distance.

He turned his head slightly and asked, “Why is he here?”

The attendant behind him bowed and replied in a hushed tone, “Young Master, Lord Si has been visiting the manor frequently lately to discuss official matters with the Second Master.”

Xiao Rong narrowed his eyes dangerously, watching until Si Yue’s figure disappeared from view.

He hadn’t been aware that Si Yue had any official dealings with his second uncle—and to be so brazen about it.

Resuming his steps, Xiao Rong exited the path but did not head toward his original destination. Instead, he went straight in the direction where Si Yue had vanished.

The attendant behind him spoke up, “Young Master, the Second Master’s residence is in the west corridor…”

Xiao Rong let out a cold snort, cutting him off. “I thought Lord Si came to the estate to discuss official matters with Second Uncle.”

The attendant dared not say more and followed Xiao Rong with bowed head as they walked in the opposite direction of the western corridor.

Beyond the long corridor lay a spacious yet secluded courtyard—an ideal place for private conversation.

Several guards stood at the courtyard entrance. As soon as Xiao Rong appeared, one of them loudly greeted, “Greetings, Young Master.”

It sounded almost like a deliberate warning to those conversing inside.

Ignoring them, Xiao Rong strode directly into the courtyard and saw the two men seated opposite each other.

Si Yue’s expression remained completely unchanged, without even a hint of surprise at seeing Xiao Rong here.

He merely gave a slight nod and spoke first, “Lord Xiao, what a coincidence.”

Second Master Xiao then spoke, his expression unlike Si Yue’s, still wearing a smile as he addressed Xiao Rong, “Chongyun, what brings you here? Did you come to discuss something with me today?”

“Second Uncle, spare me the unnecessary pleasantries.” Xiao Rong closed the distance between them in a few strides.

Standing over Second Master Xiao, he looked down at him with an air of superiority. “You visited You Shui Residence some time ago.”

Second Master Xiao’s expression shifted abruptly, any trace of a smile vanishing completely.

It wasn’t panic but rather unease that Xiao Rong would mention this so openly, as if no one else were present.

It stirred a vague apprehension in him—he couldn’t guess what Xiao Rong, with his ruthless temperament, intended to do about it.

Second Master Xiao quickly composed himself. “It had been a long time since I last saw my elder sister. I missed her, so I found some time to pay her a visit.”

“Oh? I wasn’t aware Second Uncle possessed such magnanimity, caring for the madwoman the entire Xiao Estate avoids at all costs.”

“Xiao Chongyun! That is your mother! How dare you speak of her that way!”

A faint smile tugged at Xiao Rong’s lips, but it didn’t reach the corners of his eyes. “It seems the bond between Second Uncle and my mother runs deeper than I imagined.”

Second Master Xiao was already deeply dissatisfied with Xiao Rong’s attitude. The lack of even basic respect for his elder infuriated him further.

He rose abruptly to meet Xiao Rong’s gaze. “What exactly did you come here to say today?”

Xiao Rong slowly shifted his gaze from Second Master Xiao’s face to Si Yue beside him. “It seems there’s much I’m unaware of—not only the depth of Second Uncle’s affection for my mother but also the close relationship you’ve forged with Lord Si, unbeknownst to me.”

Second Master Xiao’s face darkened as he suddenly realized—his instinctive trust had made him forget Si Yue’s presence.

Before Second Master Xiao could speak, Si Yue stood up first. “I haven’t had the chance to interject in your conversation. Just now, I thought it best not to intrude further, as you two clearly have more pressing matters to discuss. I shall take my leave.”

Second Master Xiao’s expression was grim, but Si Yue remained unperturbed. After finishing his words, he bowed to both of them and turned to leave.

Xiao Rong didn’t spare him another glance, shifting his attention back to Second Master Xiao.

“Second Uncle, there are no outsiders now. Tell me, how did you learn of my father’s whereabouts?”

“Xiao Chongyun, is that any way to speak to your elder?”

“Then how would Second Uncle prefer I speak?” Xiao Rong took a step closer, his lips still curved in a smile, but his eyes were as sharp and cold as ice picks, piercing through the other man. “I beg you, Second Uncle, please tell your nephew. I’m simply dying to know.”

Second Master Xiao shuddered at Xiao Rong’s sarcastic tone, instinctively stepping back to put some distance between them.

Gritting his teeth, he summoned a dignified expression, unwilling to show fear before Xiao Rong. “What’s the point of asking me this? Elder sister has been searching for him for years, trapped in her own obsession. What else could I do but help her find him? I never expected to discover news of his death.”

Xiao Rong seemed to calm down slightly, nodding. “True enough. Though we’re not close, Second Uncle, upon learning of my father’s death, your first thought wasn’t to tell me – the clear-headed one – but to go out of your way to You Shui Residence and inform my mentally unstable mother.”He paused abruptly, lifting his gaze with gloomy eyes.” “Second Uncle, were you trying to kill her?”

Second Master Xiao gasped sharply. Despite the distance between them, every inch of his skin prickled with the sudden murderous intent radiating from Xiao Rong.

He retreated another step uncontrollably. “X-Xiao Rong, what are you planning?Xiao Rong sneered. “Don’t worry, my mother isn’t dead yet, so I won’t do anything.”

“But if she were to stop breathing…”

“Absurd! Xiao Rong, do you realize what you’re saying!”

Second Master Xiao stared in disbelief, though chills ran down his spine.

This was the Xiao residence – he was a member of the Xiao family!

No, Xiao Rong was also family, they were blood relatives – surely he wouldn’t be so heartless.

In that moment, Second Master Xiao seemed to forget that he and Xiao Rong’s mother were also blood relatives, and the news he brought was undoubtedly a sharp blade to her.

If she died, he wouldn’t have directly caused it, but he’d delivered the weapon with his own hands.

He also didn’t know what had happened to the last person who assumed blood relations would protect them from Xiao Rong’s wrath.

But Xiao Rong proved generous. Having savored Second Master Xiao’s nearly twisted expression enough, he said, “I heard Youngest Uncle was released from prison recently.” He might hold a grudge against me for what I did before. I wonder where he is now, and if he still intends to seek revenge.”

Second Master Xiao trembled again.

He didn’t understand why Xiao Rong suddenly mentioned Xiao Sheng, but his mind couldn’t help racing toward the terrifying truth.

Xiao Rong: “If you get any news about Youngest Uncle, don’t forget to tell me.”

He finally smiled at Second Master Xiao, this time with genuine amusement reaching his eyes. “I’d like to see him again.”

When Xiao Rong returned to the residence, Si Jin was again by the birdcage near the windowsill.

Her obedience in staying put should have pleased him, but her complete absorption with the little bird – once again failing to notice his approach – irritated him.

Only when Xiao Rong drew closer did he notice the birdcage door wide open, facing directly outside as if inviting the bird to fly away freely.

Xiao Rong stopped, his expression unreadable as he watched the little bird hesitating at the cage’s edge.

As if suddenly sensing something, Si Jin turned around.

“You’re back.”Noticing his gaze, she quickly stood up, showing off, saying, ‘Chongyun, look!” Today I opened Xiao Bai’s cage, but he actually didn’t fly away.”

Xiao Rong stepped forward in silence, his face devoid of any discernible emotion, yet his gaze alone was enough to frighten the little bird that had just extended a claw back into its cage.

Si Jin was taken aback. “Why are you scaring it?”

Xiao Rong showed no remorse, merely withdrawing his gaze indifferently. “It seems to like you very much.”

Si Jin sighed helplessly and gave him a light push, then deliberately moved closer to the birdcage as if siding with the bird. “Are you really jealous of a little bird?”

Xiao Rong wrapped his arm around her and pulled her back. “You’re always looking at it.”

Si Jin was surprised. Staying in his embrace, she studied him for a moment. Was he being serious? Could someone really be jealous of a bird?

Aside from Xiao Rong’s pettiness, however, Si Jin sensed that he seemed to be in a good mood today. Though there was no smile on his face, she could feel it.

Yet she had spent a long time in her room earlier, after hearing Lan Xin and Qiu Ya speak of his parents, thinking about how to comfort his low spirits when he returned. Whether it was the heavy past or the heartbreaking present—just as Xiao Rong had said, his father was gone, and his mother might soon leave him too.

Even without many memories of her own, Si Jin genuinely ached for Xiao Rong, who had endured all of this. She thought that her past self must have felt the same way, though she didn’t know how she had acted back then.

But now, with Xiao Rong appearing so cheerful, her sympathy suddenly had nowhere to go.

Perhaps Xiao Rong could read minds, or perhaps Si Jin’s thoughts were always written plainly on her face. Without her voicing them, he had already discerned her concerns.

“I don’t care about those matters. You needn’t trouble yourself over them either.”

Si Jin felt somewhat defeated. How could anyone not care about such things? And now, it was Xiao Rong comforting her instead.

After a moment of silence, she asked, “But you originally planned to stay a few more days in the southern suburbs. Is it really alright that you returned so soon?”

“Yes. My staying there wouldn’t improve the situation. In fact, since I resemble my late father, her emotions might be more stable without seeing me.”

Si Jin’s heart ached even more upon hearing this. She couldn’t hide the change in her expression, wanting to say something yet fearing that mentioning it would only reopen Xiao Rong’s wounds. But saying nothing at all felt too indifferent.

Suddenly, Xiao Rong let out a soft chuckle. “Haven’t you already noticed I’m in a good mood today? Why do you still look so troubled?”

Si Jin was startled and looked up at him. “Can you really read minds? You always know what I’m thinking?”

Xiao Rong gave her a deep, inscrutable look. “If only that were true.” To invade her mind, to control her thoughts—to know everything in her heart.

Si Jin blinked, observing that his expression seemed to grow even more pleased. She couldn’t help but ask, “Did something good happen today?”

“No.” Xiao Rong cupped her face. “Nothing that doesn’t involve you counts as ‘good’ in my book.”

Si Jin’s eyes trembled. Even now, he couldn’t resist being sentimental.

Xiao Rong seemed to have deciphered her thoughts from her expression once again, but he made no attempt to explain or correct himself. Instead, he simply lowered his head and captured her lips.

Si Jin felt a sudden warmth on her lips. Before she could react, Xiao Rong’s moist, soft tongue had already traced their outline, as if inviting her to open them and let him plunge inside to stir everything into chaos.

For a moment, she felt both amused and exasperated. All her earlier worries and heartache for him temporarily lost their urgency.

Perhaps it really was better not to bring it up again—the more he heard, the more it would torment him.

Si Jin stopped thinking about how to clumsily comfort him, but she had no intention of getting lost in a passionate kiss with him either.

In broad daylight, Xiao Rong never knew when to stop once he started kissing.

Since he was the one who refused her comfort, she didn’t need to indulge him for it.

Si Jin tilted her head away, reaching up to pry loose the large hand cupping her cheek.

Yet again, his hold was easily broken.

But soon, that same hand moved to the nape of her neck.

She twisted her neck, shaking off his grip, only to have him pinch her waist—not too hard, but not gently either.

Si Jin was truly both annoyed and amused. Unable to hold back, she chided, “Have I ever told you that you’re like ivy clinging to a solid wall—twining and coiling, impossible to shake off?”

Shake off?

Xiao Rong narrowed his eyes slightly. That was indeed an unpleasant choice of words.

But he curved his lips into a smile and asked, “Then are you that cold, unfeeling solid wall?”

Si Jin had no ability to read minds. Seeing only his smiling face, she smiled along with him. “What nonsense—I was talking about you.”

“But I only cling to you.”

Si Jin’s cheeks grew warm. She simply couldn’t handle Xiao Rong’s level of sappiness, so when he leaned in again for another sticky kiss, she tilted her head aside once more to avoid him.

Xiao Rong lowered his gaze, staring intently at those lips now glistening from his earlier attention. He deliberately restrained himself from kissing her again.

The restless energy coursing through his body felt like it was gnawing at his bones and blood, screaming at him to kiss her again, yet he remained motionless, savoring the intense pleasure of suppression.

His mood improved even further.

An unusual euphoria surged through his mind.

Without shifting his gaze, Xiao Rong murmured under his breath, almost inaudibly, “If you liked me, even if your cage door opened, would you still not fly away?”

“What did you say?” Si Jin blinked in confusion.

His voice had been too low and muffled, making it impossible to understand—or perhaps he had been talking to himself.

Xiao Rong didn’t answer. His gaze alone felt tangible enough to devour her lips.

Si Jin frowned slightly, soon losing the capacity to think about anything else. She couldn’t help but pull her hands from his embrace and raise them to cover his eyes.

“Don’t block me. I can’t see you anymore.”

“That’s the point—I don’t want you looking. The way you stare is just…”

Si Jin struggled to describe it, especially since Xiao Rong looked completely unapologetic, as if there were nothing wrong with the intensity of his gaze.

Xiao Rong followed up with an even more justified tone: “Then if I don’t look, you can’t avoid me. I want to keep kissing you.”

Si Jin was left speechless.

He had clearly released her waist. He could easily have lifted his hand to remove hers from his eyes or simply lowered his head to kiss her again. Yet he acted as if she had bound him, leaving him unable to move.

Invisible to his eyes, Si Jin shot him an irritated glare.

But the next moment, she rose onto her toes and indulged him as he wished, lifting her head to actively press a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

Since the earlier unfinished kiss had already left its ambiguous traces, even this light, brief contact was inevitably tinged with a damp, heated sensation—far from innocent.

When Si Jin pulled away, she unconsciously pursed her lips, and the tip of her tongue resting against them tasted a lingering moisture—whether it was hers or Xiao Rong’s, she couldn’t tell.

Her cheeks flushed warm as she tried to steady herself, her heels still hovering slightly above the ground.

Suddenly, Xiao Rong acted on the very impulse she had just imagined—he took her hand, clasping it firmly in his palm, and lowered his head to capture her lips in a kiss that was both urgent and intense.

Si Jin was caught off guard, her thoughts scattering like mist as she was swept into another dizzying kiss.

After a long, lingering entanglement, Xiao Rong finally stilled.

In the quiet interlude of their mingled breaths, Si Jin gathered her thoughts and remembered the question she had meant to ask earlier.

Leaning against Xiao Rong’s chest, she whispered, “Did you ever receive any letters from Xu Zhi addressed to me while you were at home?”

Xiao Rong’s breath hitched slightly, though his chest still rose and fell in a steady rhythm.

He remained silent for a moment, making Si Jin wonder if her voice had been too soft for him to hear. She was about to repeat her question when he abruptly asked, “Are you unhappy by my side?”

“Wh-what?”

Si Jin blinked in confusion—that wasn’t what she had asked.

“Are you unhappy?”

“No—not at all,” she replied hesitantly.

It wasn’t the answer that gave her pause, but why Xiao Rong would suddenly ask such a thing.

Unable to decipher his intent, she pressed on, wanting a response to her original question. “Answer me, please—did Xu Zhi send me any letters before?”

Xiao Rong lowered his gaze slightly, his dark eyes fixed intently on hers. “No.”

Si Jin hadn’t held out much hope to begin with. She had assumed that if any letters from Shen Xuzhi had arrived, Xiao Rong would have told her.

Still, hearing his definitive answer stirred a flicker of disappointment within her.

Had Xu Zhi not had the chance to write yet?

As Si Jin frowned in thought, Xiao Rong suddenly gripped her chin, forcing her to meet his gaze.

“Why ask about her so suddenly?”

Si Jin looked into his dark eyes but couldn’t decipher the turbulent emotion swirling within them.

Yet that intensity made her uneasy.

She instinctively tried to pull away, but Xiao Rong tightened his grip, holding her firmly in place.

A faint ache spread from her chin, halting her struggle and stirring a sense of resistance within her.

At times, Si Jin felt that Xiao Rong possessed a domineering side—one that starkly contrasted with the obedient demeanor he often showed her. It was subtle, elusive, and impossible to pin down, as though she were fated to be under his control without even realizing it.

Swallowing softly, Si Jin met his shadowed gaze and replied slowly, “I’ve heard others mention many times how close Xu Zhi and I used to be. I thought she would have written to me while traveling far away, but I’ve had no news from her.”

As soon as the words left her lips, Si Jin’s heart sank.

She had lied—for no clear reason, she had concealed the truth from Xiao Rong.

She didn’t know why she felt the need to hide it from him.

Yet, even after a moment’s reflection, she had no intention of taking it back.

Xiao Rong studied her for a long moment before his grip gradually loosened. His rough thumb stroked the reddened skin of her chin, as if soothing the pain he had just caused.

The gentle caress made her skin tingle with a soft, numbing sensation, as if the earlier feeling of oppression had been nothing but an illusion, about to vanish without a trace.

Si Jin tilted her neck slightly upward and, after a moment’s thought, added softly, “If any letters from her arrive later, you must inform me immediately.”

Xiao Rong suddenly let out a soft chuckle. “Letters addressed to you would naturally be delivered directly to you by the household servants. Previously, it was because you weren’t home, but I truly haven’t received any letters from Miss Shen either. Now that you’ll be staying home, if she writes, you’ll receive it immediately.”

Upon hearing this, Si Jin’s tense emotions gradually eased.

She gave a slight nod, then reflected on her earlier defensiveness—it had been unwarranted and now felt somewhat embarrassing.

Xiao Rong suddenly gave her a gentle pinch to recapture her attention.

For some reason, he returned to their earlier conversation: “There’s no unhappiness. Wouldn’t it be nice if we continued like this forever?”

Si Jin was baffled; she hadn’t understood why he said this earlier either.

She parted her lips, but before any sound could emerge,

Xiao Rong lowered his head again, directly silencing her unspoken response—whether affirmation or denial.

Never mind, he didn’t want to hear it.

Nor did he need to.

His lips and tongue ground against hers, mingled with ambiguous wet sounds, seizing her breath and invading her thoughts.

Si Jin was kissed into dizziness. In her daze, Xiao Rong’s hoarse, muffled voice reached her ears:

“If you can’t recover your memories, if you can’t recall anything…”

“Let’s continue like this until we’re buried in the same grave.”

“Xiao Jin, wouldn’t that be good?”

Her thoughts should have drifted away with the kiss, becoming completely unfocused, unable to ponder anything, much less answer him.

But the voice at her ear persistently seeped in, flowing into her chest, stirring the depths of her heart. Her thoughts didn’t scatter—instead, they gathered in her mind.

The prolonged, entangled kiss churned amidst ambiguous wet sounds, their increasingly close-pressed bodies intertwining, sharing each other’s warmth.

Intense, scalding, as if inseparable.

After how long—long enough to cast everything aside—

the moment Xiao Rong’s lips slowly withdrew,

Si Jin still firmly and earnestly stated: “No matter what, I must strive to remember those forgotten past events.”