Chapter 44

Chapter 44: Regarding Helan In Daqi, whenever people spoke of the story of Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai, they always sighed over the couple’s devotion to their love, and over the tragic beauty and romance of their final transformation into butterflies flying off together. When Shaoyin first heard the story as a child, she was so moved and heartbroken that she cried for an entire night. When she woke the next morning, both her eyes were so swollen she could barely open them. Even after she grew older, whenever she thought of the story of Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai, Shaoyin would still feel a painful ache in her heart. Besides, as she grew older, she had begun to dream of love and fall hopelessly in love with Xiao Heng, filling her heart with all sorts of fantasies about romance. Thus, she found Zhu Yingtai’s final decision to die for love and transform into a butterfly entirely understandable. She had never heard anyone say that Zhu Yingtai ought to have lived on alone. Shaoyin found his words puzzling. After a moment of silence, she still asked softly, “Why does the Heir Prince think that?” Beside her, the Heir Prince Helan’s clothes carried a faint fragrance of pine needles, cool as snow. His deep, tranquil voice was also like the fine snow falling outside the window, whispering as it landed on the pine branches in the night. “If I were Liang Shanbo and unfortunately died young, I would hope that the woman I loved wouldn’t follow me in death. I would want her to live well in this world, let me go, let go of the past, and keep walking forward, looking ahead.” Although Shaoyin herself no longer felt any love or affection for Xiao Heng, she could still understand the story of Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai. She could feel the depth of Zhu Yingtai’s feelings for Liang Shanbo, as well as the grief and pain she could not release after his death. Shaoyin said quietly, “But Zhu Yingtai wanted to follow Liang Shanbo in death. If she remained alone in this world, she would have been too sad, too lonely, and in too much pain…” “Life in this world is long. If one does one’s best to keep walking forward and seeing what lies ahead, one may well encounter new scenery and new people. Without Liang Shanbo, perhaps she might still meet someone new who would fall in love with her. He might not be like Liang Shanbo, but he could have a sincere heart for Zhu Yingtai all the same. He might not be unsuited to her.” The Heir Prince Helan continued, “If she were a woman I loved, I would hope that after I was gone, she could put the past behind her and look ahead. I would want her to live well in this world, see more of its beautiful sights, and enjoy a peaceful, happy life.” Shaoyin was silent for a long while before asking, “…Does the Heir Prince have a woman he loves?” She had come to this marriage alliance against her will. Was the Heir Prince Helan not similarly constrained? She had loved Xiao Heng for many years. The Heir Prince Helan was slightly older than she was, and in all those years, he must have met someone he favored. Perhaps, in truth, he had already come to love a woman. Seeing the Heir Prince Helan remain silent without denying the woman’s existence, Shaoyin secretly sighed in her heart. She was sighing over her own helpless circumstances, and also over his. If he had not been the Heir Prince of Shuobei, if his marriage had not needed to yield to matters of state, then the Heir Prince Helan would surely have wanted to marry the woman he loved. In every word he spoke, he had thought of that woman’s feelings. It seemed that he truly, deeply loved her. Yet he could not marry her. Instead, he had to kneel and worship Heaven and Earth with a stranger like Shaoyin. On this so-called bridal night, he had to lie beside her on the same bed. While feeling sorrow for him, Shaoyin also grieved over her own fate. As the sadness in her heart left her temporarily speechless, the Heir Prince Helan did not speak again either. The lamplight filtered through the canopy flickered before their eyes like stars, while outside the bedchamber window, snow continued to fall through the night. Perhaps she had been tense for far too long, and her body had already reached its limit. Once her mind relaxed even slightly, Shaoyin unknowingly fell asleep to the soft rustling of the night snow. She slept quietly for an entire night beside a strange man. After breakfast the following morning, they would set out for Shuobei. The Heir Prince Helan naturally no longer wore the Daqi wedding robes of the previous day. He had changed back into Shuobei attire. He wore a dark blue-black satin robe, while his raven-black hair, unlike the hair of Central Plains men, was not tied up beneath a crown. Instead, it was gathered into fine braids with gold thread and strings of beads, then left cascading down his back. The previous night, when Shaoyin had looked at the Heir Prince Helan, she had felt that his bearing and manner resembled those of a refined scholar from the Central Plains, aside from his features being somewhat deeper and more pronounced than those of Central Plains men. But seeing him dressed like this, that illusion vanished. Shuobei men favored fitted, practical clothing for everyday wear, and their attire seemed to carry an austere sharpness born from battling wind and snow. Even though the Heir Prince Helan’s noble status meant that his clothing was made of luxurious materials and embroidered with exquisite patterns, he still looked as though he might draw the black-gold dagger at his waist at any moment and swiftly plunge it into an oncoming snow wolf of the wasteland—or an enemy lurking in the shadows. A Shuobei maid also brought Shaoyin the clothes she was to change into: the attire that the wife of Shuobei’s Heir Prince ought to wear. As Shaoyin stared at the Shuobei women’s clothing before her, her thoughts grew hazy. It seemed that once she put on these clothes, she would truly be stepping into another chapter of her life—walking into the vast snow and wind, never to look back. The Heir Prince Helan seemed to mistake her daze for silent unwillingness. He said gently, “You don’t have to change if you don’t want to. If you’re not accustomed to these clothes and would rather wear the clothing of a Central Plains woman, that’s fine too.” He added, “It would be best to wear a Shuobei sable cloak over them, though. Winters in Shuobei are very cold. The farther north the caravan travels, the colder it will become. If you dress too lightly, you’ll be unable to withstand the cold even inside the carriage.” After a moment of silence, Shaoyin still picked up the Shuobei women’s clothing. When in Rome, do as the Romans do. She bore the mission of a marriage alliance, and no matter how deeply she yearned for her homeland, she had to do her best to assimilate into Shuobei in her outward bearing and contribute everything she could to harmony between Shuobei and Daqi. With the Shuobei maid’s assistance, Shaoyin changed into the rouge-colored Shuobei women’s robe. She then had her long hair braided and coiled up, with strings of beads adorning it, and put on a long turquoise necklace and glazed bracelets. The reflection in the mirror looked unfamiliar. She seemed to have truly become a Shuobei woman, utterly unlike the spoiled and willful young lady of the Xue family she had once been. Suppressing the sorrow in her heart, Shaoyin lowered her eyes slightly and followed the Heir Prince Helan out of the room. Yet the moment she crossed the threshold of the bridal chamber, her melancholy thoughts were cast aside by a sudden commotion. At some point, the courtyard outside had filled with Shuobei men clad in iron armor. They had originally stood in complete silence, so still that no one would have known they were there. But as soon as she and the Heir Prince Helan emerged, they moved in perfect unison, placing a hand over their hearts and dropping to one knee. Then they all shouted something at the tops of their voices, their booming cry seeming capable of splitting the heavens. Startled, Shaoyin instinctively retreated half a step. Her heel struck the threshold, and just as she began to lose her balance, the Heir Prince Helan gently supported her back. After steadying her, he smiled and said, “Don’t be afraid. They’re congratulating us. This is a Shuobei custom.” Shaoyin calmed herself. She saw the Heir Prince Helan say something to the Shuobei guards, who replied with a loyal cry but still did not rise. Just as she was beginning to wonder why, the Heir Prince Helan looked back at her with a smile. Shaoyin froze for a moment before understanding. As the Heir Princess, she was supposed to say something too. But she did not understand the Shuobei language, so she could only imitate the Heir Prince Helan’s tone and say something to the guards, without having the slightest idea what she was saying. She seemed not to have said anything wrong. The guards responded to her just as they had responded to the Heir Prince Helan, but they remained on one knee, as though waiting for something. …Waiting for what? While Shaoyin stood there in confusion, she saw the Heir Prince Helan hesitate briefly before approaching her. “My apologies. This is also one of our Shuobei customs.” After resting one hand lightly on her shoulder and murmuring those words beside her ear, the Heir Prince Helan slipped his other arm around her waist and lifted her horizontally into his arms. Shaoyin had grown up without ever being held like this by a young man. Shocked, her body instantly stiffened, and her heart began pounding wildly. The instant the Heir Prince Helan carried her outside, the Shuobei guards who had been kneeling on one knee rose all at once. They began singing a northern song that Shaoyin could not understand. Laughing, they surrounded her and the Heir Prince Helan like stars clustering around the moon, escorting them toward the waiting caravan with great strides. The Heir Prince Helan carried her all the way to the carriage they would ride in, then personally lifted her into the carriage. Although he set her down afterward, the stiffness in Shaoyin’s body did not seem to disappear at once. Leaning against the brocade carpet spread inside the carriage, she looked at the Heir Prince Helan, not knowing what to say. The Heir Prince Helan did not say anything more either. He merely smiled at her before withdrawing from the carriage. He would not be riding with her. Instead, he would travel outside on horseback. He had assigned a maid to accompany and attend to her, and although the maid was from Shuobei, she could speak some Chinese. The carriage and horses set off toward the border pass in Daqi’s northern frontier, heading for the frozen, snow-covered land of Shuobei. Shaoyin sat inside the carriage, her mood especially complicated and heavy, when she suddenly heard what sounded like laughter and commotion from outside. “What’s happening out there…?” Shaoyin, who could not understand a word of Shuobei, asked the maid. The maid respectfully replied, “The attendants are asking the Heir Prince to sing. This is a Shuobei wedding custom. When a man takes a woman home as his bride, he sings joyful wedding songs along the way.” What was there to sing about? Shaoyin thought to herself that she was not truly the woman the Heir Prince Helan had wanted to marry. He had come to Lizhou against his will to marry a Central Plains woman he had never even known before. If he had been able to marry the woman he loved, the Heir Prince Helan would surely have answered his attendants’ request and sung a Shuobei song at this moment. But what was there to celebrate in marrying her? How could he possibly sing joyfully? As Shaoyin thought this, the Heir Prince Helan’s singing drifted in from outside the carriage.